Who has your remote control?

13 Apr, 2015: My nanimama (grandmother) told me once about a katha she watched on the TV, and that wisdom was so beautiful, that I wanted to share it with you all.

We are constantly influenced by situations around us. How people behave with us, how situations are formed and how our expectations are met, everything influence our mood, behaviour and day. If someone happens to not meet our expectations, different emotional reactions arouse – we can get angry, confused, sad and so on. In the next moment, when this person gives you a gift, we can get happy, cheerful, feel bad for getting angry in the first place and the like. Our mood, behaviour and how our day goes, is dependent on OTHERS and the SITUATIONS around you. Our remote control is in others hand, not ours. They can choose if they want to press the “I-want-to-make-Harveen-happy”-button or “I-want-to-make-Harveen-sad”-button.

lotus-flower11-300x225 (26K)Sikhi talks about the chardikala concept. Being in a stable state. How can we be in a stable state when we are dependent on which button people around us are pressing? It’s logical that our state of mind will fluctate, when we depend on others. We are actually in opposite state than that one Sikhi is conveying – we are in a highly unstable state. Sikhi is conveying to have our remote control in our own hands. We should decide which button to press. If we have chosen to press the “content”-button one day, our state of mind will not be affected, whether anyone doesn’t meet our expectations or gives us a gift. We will be content anyway.

What’s the benefit by having our own remote control in our hands? For one thing we will lead a stable life. Our reactions to situations and people around us, will be in our own hands. Secondly, our own welfare and health will improve. If someone creates an unpleasant atmosphere, this atmosphere will not affect us, because we have already pressed the “content”-button. We will answer in a detached, pleasant manner, and this can sometimes help us change the unpleasant environment into a pleasant one.

This takes time. Make up your mind to exercize this each day. Be conscious of when your remote control is not in your hands. Be the lotus flower in the mud.

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Harveen Kaur

Harveen Kaur

I am a psychologist and I am in love with the work, both developing myself and serving my clients

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